Funny the things you can find when cleaning out your closet. Well, in this case, my Mac…

I came across transcript notes from an interview I did on January 10^th, 2020. It was with a university student completing their Masters. The study was meant to explore how coaches understand and use teachable moments in their approaches to coaching. Pardon the stream of consciousness style of writing this morning as I have removed the questions from the interviewer and made few edits to the transcript. I am struck by how similarly I think 3 years later.

Teachable moments are opportunities to make a real impact and you have to recognize what they are and then you have to capture them appropriately. And I think that is an art and I think that is the art of teaching and the art of coaching. I don’t think you can teach a teacher, I don’t think you can coach a coach to be better. I think there is an innate ability. You can get better, but part of that innate ability is to recognize opportunities for growth and then to nail them. I think that would tie into what some would describe as teachable moments. We talk about how you know you’ve made the right decision, we talk a lot about being good people and making the right decisions, and you know you’ve made the right decision when you are uncomfortable by it. You’re uncomfortable because you are growing. My worst nightmare is to be the same person I was yesterday. That’s my worst fear.

I like to use a train station analogy. We’re always going onto the next train station. There is never a final destination. I love Robert Hastings’ piece called “The Station”. It’s all about there not being one place you want to be. It’s not about “next”, it’s not about not enjoying where you are in the moment, of course that is important. But we’ve got to wake up the next day to strive for more. And how do you do that? Well, again, you need to find opportunities to grow.

I just love the image of the train. Imagery is so powerful. A picture speaks a thousand words. Especially with Millennials and Gen Z now, the way they learn, the way they communicate, it is all image-based – Instagram, Tik-Tok – everything is in short bursts. They’re used to different things than I was, and part of my evolution as a coach is staying relevant to how they best learn. But that image of a train. That just stuck with me when I first read it and it has just kind of always been there in the background.

I don’t know if I was mature enough to recognize what I was learning during my “formal teachings” – teachers college in 1999 and my Level 3 coaching certification in 2008, for example. But most of my learning has come from informal settings. As I have matured, gotten older, I think I am much more open to change, which I think is usually the reverse, but I just recognize the need for constant learning, more now than ever. I work every day on being a better servant leader. I’ve really changed my approach and my perception to leadership. When you get a bit more time to breathe and reflect, then you have time to reflect. You become aware of gaps. And then you can put steps in to fill those gaps. And that is what I’ve tried to do.

The Station – by Robert Hastings

Tucked away in our subconscious minds is an idyllic vision. We see ourselves on a long, long trip that almost spans the continent. We’re traveling by passenger train, and out the windows we drink in the passing scene of cars on nearby highways, of children waving at a crossing, of cattle grazing on a distant hillside, of smoke pouring from a power plant, of row upon row of corn and wheat, of flatlands and valleys, of mountains and rolling hills, of biting winter and blazing summer and cavorting spring and docile fall.

But uppermost in our minds is the final destination. On a certain day at a certain hour we will pull into the station. There will be bands playing, and flags waving. And once we get there so many wonderful dreams will come true. So many wishes will be fulfilled and so many pieces of our lives finally will be neatly fitted together like a completed jigsaw puzzle. How restlessly we pace the aisles, damning the minutes for loitering … waiting, waiting, waiting, for the station.

However, sooner or later we must realize there is no one station, no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly outdistances us.

“When we reach the station, that will be it !” we cry. Translated it means, “When I’m 18, that will be it ! When I buy a new 450 SL Mercedes Benz, that will be it ! When I put the last kid through college, that will be it ! When I have paid off the mortgage, that will be it ! When I win a promotion, that will be it ! When I reach the age of retirement, that will be it ! I shall live happily ever after !”

Unfortunately, once we get it, then it disappears. The station somehow hides itself at the end of an endless track.

“Relish the moment” is a good motto, especially when coupled with Psalm 118:24: “This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” It isn’t the burdens of today that drive men mad. Rather, it is regret over yesterday or fear of tomorrow. Regret and fear are twin thieves who would rob us of today.

So, stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more ice cream, go barefoot oftener, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more and cry less. Life must be lived as we go along. The station will come soon enough.