“I don’t shine if you don’t shine.”

– Aminatou Sow & Ann Friedman

In a past blog, I shared about a book called Big Friendship – How We Keep Each Other Close by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman. In their book, Sow and Friedman write a chapter called Shine Theory. I wanted to share key take-aways about Shine Theory; you can read so much more about Shine Theory here: https://www.shinetheory.com/

• Shine Theory is an investment in helping someone be their best self—and relying on their help in return.
• It is a conscious decision to bring your full self to your friendships, and to not let insecurity or envy ravage them.
• Shine Theory is a commitment to asking, “Would we be better as collaborators than as competitors?”
• It’s a practice of cultivating a spirit of genuine happiness and excitement when your friends are doing well, and being there for them when they aren’t.

“I thoroughly enjoy working with other women. I think it makes me a better athlete and person. When we achieve great things on our own, it doesn’t feel nearly as special.”

– Shalane Flanagan

On their website, Sow and Friedman share a few stories of Shine Theory in action. I chose “The Shalane Flanagan Effect”. Excerpts below are from Lindsay Crouse’s piece in the NY Times:

• Shalane Flanagan won the New York City Marathon in 2017; she was the first American woman to win in 40 years.
• Every single one of her training partners — 11 women in total — has made it to the Olympics while training with her.
• In 2009, Flanagan and her running coach created a team of professional female distance runners who would train together and push one another to striking collective success.
• Instead of being threatened by her teammates’ growing accomplishments, Flanagan embraced them, and brought in more women, elevating them to her level until they become some of the best runners in the world.
• Flanagan does not just talk about elevating women; she elevates them. And they win.

“Elevating other women is actually an act of self-interest: It’s not so lonely at the top if you bring others along.”

– Lindsay Crouse

Who have you helped shine?

Better yet…

Who will you help shine?

For more about Shalane Flanagan: